If you build it, they will come...or not.

Yesterday was theoretically the first day of the after-school program and Amelia, my co-worker, and I sat and stared at each other until 5 when we decided no one was coming. We thought we had one of the neighborhood girls and perhaps one of her friends, but they didn't show up, after telling us they would definitely be there. I'm actually sort of fine with it because I know these things take time, but I just feel that since I'm sort of alone with this, I'm only ever reporting bad things to everyone else. Then people want to be helpful and offer suggestions which is great, but then I feel alot of self-doubt like all I do is sit around and think all day about how to make this better and why didn't I think of that? I know I am capable of doing this, but for some reason it isn't working. Oh well, faith and patience, faith and patience.

To make myself feel better, I took today off since I worked alot last weekend on the fair, and had an adventure. Thanks to the wonderful guidebook given to me by my brother and sister-in-law, I found Bellingrath Gardens (pictured above). Its the home and gardens of some guy that made a fortune bottling Coke. It was very interesting, but more importantly, lovely to walk around and very tranquil for my soul which needed some reminding that the most beautiful things grow slowly and in cycles. Roses and butterflies (and after-school programs?) come from something small and gross, but hopeful.

After that, I drove into Mobile to see what I could see. There was alot of interesting, beautiful architecture, sort of like if Savannah and New Orleans had a baby, but alot of it seemed abandoned and I'm not sure why. I found an awesome house museum (and those of you who know me really well, know I have a nerdy weakness for old houses, ESPECIALLY Southern ones) with a costumed tour guide. I got a one-on-one tour and so was able to ask lots of questions. It never ceases to amaze me, though, at these places how the issue of slavery is treated. Ann, my guide, kept saying that the family had city slaves which were the upper tier of slaves and were actually treated "quite well, with alot of dignity and respect." I didn't inform Ann that while its true that they may not have been getting beaten everyday, they still were only one-third of a person according to our constitution and while it was probably better for them to be inside rather than working in fields, they had no agency in that decision making process. I just feel like they could say, yes they had slaves and it was terrible but it was status quo, instead of trying to sugarcoat it. All in all, a fun relaxing day, though.

Tomorrow might be intense. We're going to a Presbytery meeting where several churches are expected to leave the denomination. For those of you not familiar with Presbyterian politics, a Presbytery is a governing body of a group of churches, hence I'm working for the Presbytery of Mississippi. This year, PCUSA revisited the issue of homosexuality- namely that ordained ministers must be in a faithful heterosexual relationship or be abstinate. Essentially, no decision was made and everyone just agreed to pray and think on it some more. Instead of being a moderate compromise, this decision only served to make both extremes angry. Therefore, 3 or 4 of the very conservative churches down here are leaving the denomination tomorrow and we're going to the meeting to see how it happens. As someone hoping to work within this system for a living, I'm extremely interested to see how this all happens. I'm not sure if there's any way at this point to save these churches, but I hope so.

Also, is anyone out there? I haven't gotten e-mails in a while! (hint hint, wink wink). G'night.